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Science Jokes

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#26 DaveC2042

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 09:18 PM

I have an old limerick.

A mosquito was heard to complain
"A chemist has poisoned my brain"
The cause of his sorrow
Was paradichloro
Diphenyltrichloroethane
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#27 DaveC2042

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Posted 30 November 2020 - 09:20 PM

And what do you get if you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber?

Nothing. You can't cross a vector with a scaler.
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#28 FirstSight

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Posted 01 December 2020 - 12:08 AM

And what do you get if you cross a mosquito with a mountain climber?

Nothing. You can't cross a vector with a scaler.

*Argh!*  Now that's a bona fide nerdy science joke.  A good one!


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#29 chrysalis

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Posted 01 December 2020 - 04:28 AM

Pythagoras-Einstein.JPG


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#30 chrysalis

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Posted 01 December 2020 - 04:28 AM

I poured root beer into a square cup. Now I have beer.


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#31 chrysalis

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Posted 01 December 2020 - 04:29 AM

What do you call beer made with heavy water?

 

Chernob-ale.


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#32 chrysalis

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Posted 01 December 2020 - 04:29 AM

Do you know why seven eight nine? Because you’re supposed to eat three squared meals a day!


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#33 CowTipton

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Posted 01 December 2020 - 11:34 AM

Have you heard the CDC's theme song?

 

Pink Floyd

"Is There Antibody Out There?"


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#34 chrysalis

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Posted 01 December 2020 - 03:02 PM

Have you heard the CDC's theme song?

 

Pink Floyd

"Is There Antibody Out There?"

That's why ants don't get sick - they have little anty-bodies... :rimshot:


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#35 chrysalis

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Posted 02 December 2020 - 03:46 AM

bio-phys.JPG


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#36 chrysalis

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Posted 02 December 2020 - 03:47 AM

Why do atheists have trouble with exponents?

 

They don’t believe in higher powers.


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#37 chrysalis

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Posted 02 December 2020 - 03:47 AM

Teacher: What is 2n plus 2n?

 

Student: I’m not sure. That sounds 4n to me. :rimshot:


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#38 chrysalis

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Posted 02 December 2020 - 03:48 AM

What is a bird’s favorite type of math?

 

Owl-gebra.


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#39 Keith Rivich

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Posted 02 December 2020 - 06:45 PM

I'm stealing this joke from a cartoon post one of our club members made to our e-mail list. More of a riddle...

 

Two paranormal hunters are spying on a house down the street. As the sun sets a figure emerges on the front porch. The hunter looking through his refractor says "Holy cow...that person looks like a vampire".  The guy watching through his Celestron C-6 says "what person". 


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#40 chrysalis

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Posted 03 December 2020 - 04:03 AM

newton.JPG


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#41 chrysalis

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Posted 03 December 2020 - 04:04 AM

Which snakes are good at math? Adders.


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#42 chrysalis

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Posted 03 December 2020 - 04:04 AM

Oldie but goodie:

 

Why can’t a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot


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#43 chrysalis

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Posted 03 December 2020 - 04:05 AM

Who’s the king of the pencil case? The ruler.


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#44 DaveC2042

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Posted 03 December 2020 - 05:09 AM

What's purple and commutes?

An Abelian grape.
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#45 chrysalis

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Posted 03 December 2020 - 05:30 AM

Why was a afraid it was not equal to a?

 

Identity crisis.


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#46 chrysalis

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Posted 03 December 2020 - 05:31 AM

How do you calculate the length of a squiggly snake?

 

Python-gorean theorem


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#47 Keith Rivich

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Posted 03 December 2020 - 08:48 AM

I'm stealing this joke from a cartoon post one of our club members made to our e-mail list. More of a riddle...

 

Two paranormal hunters are spying on a house down the street. As the sun sets a figure emerges on the front porch. The hunter looking through his refractor says "Holy cow...that person looks like a vampire".  The guy watching through his Celestron C-6 says "what person". 

Anyone get the riddle?


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#48 CowTipton

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Posted 03 December 2020 - 10:51 AM

Anyone get the riddle?

Vampires have no reflections!  (mirrors)


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#49 chrysalis

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Posted 03 December 2020 - 12:21 PM

From earlier, repeated here:

 

CN space vampires.png


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#50 Keith Rivich

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Posted 03 December 2020 - 12:55 PM

Vampires have no reflections!  (mirrors)

waytogo.gif


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