I really like the idea of this! A couple of comments:
- Who is your audience? For the group sessions, the pricing and length seem to target dedicated and well-off astronomy fans, but not the "curious first-time observers" you also mention -- of which there are many more in the world. You can probably serve both, but be sure to differentiate, and provide something targeted to the casual audiences too.
- I agree that the prices seem high, especially for large groups. Only a very small number of high-end corporate clients could spend $8K for an event for 10 people. Your costs are essentially the same whether it's for one person or 10, so it doesn't make sense to charge 10x as much for the latter.
- For much of the public, 5 hours outside at night is more than they can take. Shorter sessions -- 2h of observing -- are probably a sweet spot for many.
- People are going to want to see some info about you and your telescope. You shouldn't make them search around elsewhere online to find this -- put it on your site. Show photos of it, with clients using it at night. Keep in mind that for a public audience, things like "Dobsonian", "M11", "Obsession", "25 inch" -- these will come off as jargon. Talk about why they care, rather than the tech specs. (But have the specs somewhere on the page too, for those who want them.)
- What people are really spending money on is *you* -- your ability to tour them around the sky, relate to them about the awesomeness of the sky, take care of the tech so they don't have to, etc. Play up your experience and background as a great host. For many people, it's won't matter if it's a 25" scope or a 4" one -- what they care about is *you*.
- I dig the idea of the imaging workshops and one-on-one sessions. I bet that groups will be your largest segment, but you should definitely have options.
- How will you deal with large groups? If you have 30 people out there, how many telescopes will you have, and how many assistants? If clients are paying big $$, they won't want to spend most of their time standing in line.
- I suggest you put together a page showing how the night will work. What will they do for 5 hours? How much of that is driving / setup; how many things will they see; will you show them the constellations; will they take images and get to take them home; what are you going to bring to keep them warm / well-fed; etc.
- Where are you? I know it's called "The Mobile Observatory" but it's not clear if people come to your site, or you will drive X hours to meet them, etc.
Good luck! I love the idea and I think there are a lot of people who this can resonate with.
-Hankk